Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The Fatal Kiss!

Thank goodness it was just my normal over-reacting! Like I said, I actually didn't think about the possible bigotry until much later in the evening, so it wasn't my first reaction at all ... but I still had to ask. I had to know! The answer ...

The assistant director actually laughed when I asked her if Kali's skin was the "issue". She assured me that they have no tolerance at the preschool for such things and that if a parent had "issue" with Kali's color, that parent would not be welcome at the daycare. In fact, she said that many of the parents are quite fond of Kali and often talk to her when they drop off their kids. Apparently, this particular little boy who has the "issue" had been at another daycare prior to this one and some things happened. She could not tell me what things ... and honestly, I didn't want to know ... but the mom now tends to over-react herself over something as innocent as a kiss from an affectionate 3 year old. But hey ... depending on what the issue from the previous daycare is, I might be just as overprotective of my children.

Whew! Now I don't have to go and beat someone up ...

Monday, April 7, 2008

The Kali and Kuri Reunion!

We meet again!

We finally got to have the long-awaited reunion of the two good buddies from Addis Ababa! Of course, it didn't quite go as we had hoped. Kuri very much remembers Kali, but Kali wasn't quite so sure about Kuri ... after all, she's been here now for almost 10 months and little 3 year old minds just don't remember too much from being 2. But it was still a really nice reunion. Kuri was a little shy at first, but by the time lunch was over, she was laughing at things and having a good time. They did NOT want to stand next to each other for a picture, so we had to trick them and take the picture when they didn't notice. Of course, smart as Kuri is, she figured out I had taken a picture and was none too happy with me.

We can't wait to get together again with the Waltons. The next time should be much easier since the girls have now become reacquainted with each other.

On a side note, I think I may have just experienced my first bout of bigotry with Kali ... I think. I am going to have to dive into this a little further and report back tomorrow. I went to pick the kids up from daycare today. They were on the playground so I stopped there first to pick them up before going into the school to get their things. One of the teachers came up to me with a strange look on her face and asked me if I had been in the office yet. Kali was sitting off to the side of the playground with a little boy and another teacher was talking to them, so I just assumed she had gotten in trouble and I asked if that was it. The teacher tells me, "Well, no, not in trouble. But she (lowered voice) kissed one of her friends today on the lips. They'll tell you about it in the office because they have an incident report for you to sign." An incident report!! for a 3 year kissing another 3 year old!! The horrors! So we head into the school to get their things, and the assistant director pulls me into a side room and quietly tells me, in a very hushed voice, that Kali had kissed one of the other students, went and played, and then came back and kissed him again, all in the span of about two minutes. I guess my face must have said it all, because she quickly tried to explain to me that this little boy she kissed "has ... umm ... issues with this." What kind of issues?? They do go to a church-based preschool, but it's Methodist, for goodness sake ... not something super conservative where kissing is only allowed between two consenting married adults! I told her that I didn't understand why it was such a big deal ... she's only 3 years old after all. There was absolutely nothing sexual about it ... she kisses her brothers on the lips too. So she tries to tell me that it really isn't a big deal, but some of the parents make it into a bigger deal than it really is. Ok, I can kind of understand that. Parents who don't know that ALL kids bite each other around the age of two make a big deal out of that too when their child happens to be on the receiving end of a bite (even though their child is probably also doing a little biting of their own). I am still a bit flabbergasted by it all and she proceeds to ask me if I am mad. I'm not mad, just a little confused. Why would they make such a big deal over a 3 year old kissing another kid, and in such hushed tones???


So I am cooking dinner this evening still in a state of confusion by it all and it hits me ... is it because she is (gasp!) B-L-A-C-K? Is that the "issue" the assistant director spoke of? If so, it has to be an issue with the parent, not the child. "Some parents make a bigger deal out of it than it really is." And the hushed tones, pulling me into a side room so as not to be overheard by another parent ...


I WILL ask about this tomorrow and report back. I sure hope I am wrong about this ...