Thanksgiving snow in North Texas!!

Kali and "Aunt" Cathy catching snowflakes

What a shocker! Sitting around the living room watching football after the turkey gorge, and someone yells, "It's snowing!" Kali got to experience snow for the first time and she loved it. No snowman yet ... it was a wet snow that didn't stick, but she and Carson were able to get a few little snowballs out of the accumulation on the cars. And Jordan thought he had to go to Wisconsin to see some snow for Thanksgiving!

This is Kali's new hair. I know, I know ... it doesn't look much different than before. We had about 1/2 of the length taken off, so no more Afro Puffs for a while. This short hair is so much easier to deal with. Just wet it down in the mornings, spray a little leave-in conditioner, pick out and go! Maybe that's why I keep mine short too ... add a blow dryer and take away the pick, though.

Every time we both look at Kali, we can't help but think of the difference between the little girl we brought home and the little girl we have now. Every day she adds more to her vocabulary and she is such a chatterbox ... fits right into my side of the family! She smiles and laughs all the time and those beautiful little eyes just sparkle. We have learned how to divert her almost-tantrums now ... distraction works wonders! All I have to do is get her talking about something else and she forgets all about what made her upset in the first place. It takes a lot of patience (and I will admit that this is something I run short of more often than I would like) and trial-and-error to find out what works. I hope we have hit on something now that will work for quite a long time. Of course, we still have the drama ... oh, the drama! One would think her leg was being cut off when she gets the slightest little booboo! And when she gets mad at us, she starts crying for anyone, and I mean ANYONE, who is not in the immediate area. It was her Papa, it was her sister Landree, and more recently it was her teacher, Alicia! The one that had us laughing the hardest was when she was crying for her little 3 year old friend from daycare, Lily!

But the best part of having Kali ... when she grabs my face and says "I love you, Mommy" just right out of the blue.

We are both completely in love with our daughter! Because of this, I can now say what I am about to say and be comfortable with it. I have always tried to be honest in this blog, so here goes.

I was very disappointed in myself when it was not love at first sight with Kali. I was even more disappointed when the love did not seem to come for some time. I didn't want to talk about it for a while ... I thought there was something wrong with me, or that maybe we had jumped into adoption too soon. I certainly didn't want to write about it in my blog ... what would people think of me? "What a witch, not loving that precious little girl!" Don't get me wrong ... I always wanted to take care of her and protect her - that maternal thing - but I just wasn't prepared for the lack of affection that I had for this child. I know we have all had the fantasies of seeing our children for the first time and having them immediatey love us and us love them. Even though I knew this was just a fantasy, I couldn't help but wonder if it still couldn't happen that way ... but it didn't. Maybe it was having biological children of my own already, whom I absolutely adore, and then adopting; maybe it was adopting a toddler rather than an infant; or maybe it was neither of these and it was just me.

But then I did start talking about it to friends and family, and I found out that maybe I wasn't so weird after all. Maybe it was more normal than I thought not to have that instant love with this new little person in my life. And then it happened. I can't say exactly when, but sometime in the past 6 months, I fell in love with my daughter! I am pretty sure it happened sooner for Rick, and I must say that I am a little envious of that. Now I find myself doing the same things to her that I do to Carson ... stroking her hair or cheek, rubbing her back when she is sitting next to me, kissing her for no reason at all. When I tell her that I love her, it comes straight from my heart and I know that I mean every breath of those 3 words! So, for those of you who may be experiencing this same situation, you're not weird. Just be patient ... it happens. For those of you who bonded instantly and felt that love from the moment you first laid eyes on your sweet children, be thankful for that blessing!

So on this first Thanksgiving with our new daughter and our newly formed family of seven, I am most thankful for the mysterious and wonderful way that love works its miracles in our hearts!

Happy Thanksgiving from the Page Family!